Sunday, July 06, 2008

The Life

When I make up my mind that I want something, I want the process to begin immediately and to see aggressive progress being made at every moment.  However, our house is currently surrounded by a vortex in which time doesn't progress as quickly as it does in the rest of the world.  

We're waiting for our social worker to return from vacation so we can do our homestudy, we met with the friend of my boss who adopted her son and could offer us advice, very helpful advice, and, on her suggestion, we're looking into agencies in states where there are large multicultural populations.  However, making spreadsheets isn't making progress, and no matter how many Google searches I do for domestic adoption agencies in Texas, the answers that I want aren't forthcoming.  I want to know to whom we can turn to walk us through this process, I want to know how we're going to afford it, I want to know if we are ever going to get a child.  I suck at waiting, especially when I seem to be stuck with no help coming.  I bloody well want it all to begin so it can end.  

I'm buying yarn as a balm.  I'm padding the crate of our life so the hard corners of unexpected trials won't bruise us when we crash into them.  I want to avoid cracks in shipping, and knitting keeps my hands from peeling off all the paint from our veneered souls.  Knitting countless socks might make the waiting less torturous.  

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