Monday, August 29, 2005

Be ye forewarned.

Let me apologize in advance-my posts are probably going to be reeeeeeally cranky for a while as I'm starting Weight Watchers again today. I lost 15 pounds earlier this year and need to get back on the wagon as seeing recent photos of myself almost caused me to go blind from the horror. I'm SO TIRED of how enormous my hips and boobs have become. My God, they're titanic. They've taken over the house and nowhere is safe. Hide all breakables and turn pot handles inwards, 'cause I'll take 'em down with my massiveness. I know I've gained too much weight when I can't safely navigate around household objects without bruising myself on table corners or ripping laminate off the countertops. I saw photos of myself from behind (save the children!) taken at the workshop two weeks ago, and it looks as though I have Visible Panty Lines (VPL) even when I don't, as the scar that traverses my ass gets more pronounced the fatter my butt gets. No fashion shame is greater than looking like you don't know to wear appropriate undergarments with lightweight fabric. I long for fall and heavier clothing.

As of today, I changed my work hours to 9-5:30 so I can have a reasonable wake-up time during production runs. This will allow me, during slower periods, to work out first thing in the morning before I shower. The ONLY way I can make myself work out regularly is if it doesn't interfere with my evening schedule. I need my time off once I get home now as it gets rarer during the opera season. That and I despise working out at night. Coming home ravenous only to have to change in to a sports bra and bounce to indeterminate techno with muscular Barbies with plasticine hair-oh the trials I face! Also, taking two showers a day is a huge waste of our precious natural resources. Yeah, damn it, I'm saving water!

I have to find some good recipes for the crock pot. If I'm going to lose weight, I can't eat out. It's just too tempting to eat utter crap and I have the willpower of a housecat, so restraining myself is just a ridiculous suggestion. Don't make it.

I volunteered to be a test subject for a new company in Bothell who is developing a GROUNDBREAKING NEW LIPOSUCTION TECHNIQUE!!! Supposedly it's ultrasonographic, so it breaks up the fat and the body reabsorbs it and it passes out through the digestive system. COOL!!! They aren't trying it out on test subjects here yet (only in third world countries with no human subjects restrictions and a willing population), so I'll have to lose weight the old fashioned way.

God damn old fashioned way.

1 comment:

AAM said...

sigh, I too long for fall. I want my sweaters and corduroy!!