Wednesday, February 27, 2008


Do you ever feel as though having to put away dishes one more time will cause you to snap and start throwing every plate and bowl out of the too-small cupboard because the door won't shut when all the little ramekins are neatly stacked next to the measuring cups? Do you ever wish that you could throw out all your furniture and bed linens and rugs and curtains and paintings and electronics so you don't have to do anything other than vacuum the bare floor ever again? Do you ever want to give away all of your clothing and become a nudist (or exhibitionist) so you never ever again have to do laundry? Does even the idea of having an appointment with your gynecologist sound preferable to sorting through all the mail? Do you ever want to hermetically seal your house and live in a bubble so no dust ever touches any horizontal surface?

If the answer to any of these questions is yes, please tell me. We should form a group and do chants. Maybe learn witchcraft. Harness the undead to clean the microwave. Take up hooking to have enough money to hire a housekeeper. All of those things sound pretty reasonable.


shellswick said...

Oh hell yes.

Scott said...

We have self cleaning ovens, why the hell can't we have self cleaning homes!!! AAAAaaaargh!!!