Sucking it up.

I really do hate auditioning. Every time I have an audition, I think of a million reasons why I should cancel, i.e., I don't know my music well enough, they won't ever cast me, I'm too chubby for any role, I'll get nervous and forget my words, blah blah blah. A few days before auditions, I get so nervous that I have trouble sleeping and am a wretched cow to Christian. I get convinced that I don't know what I'm doing and that the auditors are going to roll their eyes and tap their pens and say "thank you!" pointedly in the middle of my first phrase. Then, I show up at the audition (well, today's audition) and the auditors are SO NICE and friendly and amazingly cool and chatty and hilarious that I'm not nervous and I actually sing OK, and it doesn't matter if I don't get cast because I feel good about how I did. Mostly. If I don't think too much about how I sang. Shit. How did I sing?